September 22, 2013
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Memorable birthday in a different kind of way
Let’s see,
how should I start? Let’s start with my birthday wishes. Now that I’m 24 years old, I’m almost at the quarter length of a century…and if I recall correctly, I actually have this extensive mental list of items I’d like to do before I turn 25…so time is definitely ticking off quickly! As the age 30 comes to a closer call by the minute, I guess my 24 year old wishes were quite frankly related to both my near and further future. I wanted the people around me to be healthy and happy, that i could have a healthy and long lasting relationship with Calvin, and that I would be able to find a full time job that would be fulfilling to me. Sometimes I can’t help but feel bad because I feel like I’m way behind everybody else in terms of finding a permanent and stable job, but sometimes I try to encourage myself by thinking that every interview is a new experience for me to see something new in different companies. The only thing that I can hope for is that my mom’s “auntie” friends won’t ask me so much about what I’m doing every single time I see them. Yes I don’t have a stable job but I’m not unemployed ok? And no I’m not trying to be lazy and I’m not useless either. I’m just waiting for my chance.
So, this birthday, I received an early birthday present that I’ll be carrying with me for the next little while. Shortly after I came back from Singapore I went to a gynaecologist who referred me to a hormone specialist. I performed some blood tests, ultrasound, and MRI scan and it turns out that I have a pituitary tumour, about the size of a pea. Although it’s not very big it’s been affecting certain functions of my body so I’ve been prescribed some medication and I’ll have to do some check ups every 6 months To monitor my progress. As shocked as I was when I initially heard about the news, I’m quite thankful that no surgery will be required and that medication should help to control my tumor. And that’s my first present. Another reminder to self that life is very unpredictable. Like a drama.
Then the second birthday present came just three days before my actual birthday. the bunch of us from Kebe were at boathouse celebrating Ivy and my birthday when I ate a piece of sirloin that I think must have had some bacteria in it, because the next thing I knew I started having diarrhea that night and it never stopped until now. It truly accompanied me through from age 23 to 24 every second of the way. Needless to say thanks to my diarrhea I lost about 5-6 pounds, which saves a few ways trip to the gym. Another reminder to self to be careful next time going to boathouse and that inshoukd be careful with what I put into my body.
Tomorrow I’m supposed to attend a celebration for me at a friend’s place. Sadly, I won’t be able to go because of my diarrhea. For the whole week I was looking forward to spending some good time with my friend but now it’s gonna be another goner. Not sure if I should count this as a third present to self, but I guess either way this has got to be one of the most memorable birthdays I’ve had in years….in quite a different way.
Calvin always tells me not to compare myself with other people, because there are always struggles behind each persons stories that we can’t tell. But to me, I sometimes really wonder why some people have everything that I’ve ever wanted in such an easy way.
next birthday, I hope that I can do what I wanted to do this birthday but couldn’t, which is to bake lots and lots of cookies and give them out to people around my neighbourhood and veg t strangers on the street. Maybe only with a giving heart will my perspective of what I already have in life change.
ps: bad grammar but oh wells, I haven’t written in awhile
