February 6, 2012

  • Dear Xanga,

    I can't believe its already been one month past 2012! Ever since I came back all I've really been doing is eat, sleep, relax, and work. I've also been applying for full time positions but other than that I feel really contented with my life right now which means I'm really happy but not motivated to strive for anything in particular right now. Except for the fact that I'm in desperate need of money right now =P. But with my part time job right now the maximum I can earn per month would only be approximately 1000 CAD, which means that minus my phone bill and gas would leave me with maybe 850-900 per month. And then 100 would go into my long term investments and 500 would go into my savings and another 100 for offering...so my spending money after all my calculations would look something like this:

    1000
    -50 phone
    -100 gas
    -100 investments
    -500 TFSA savings
    -100 offering
    =150 CAD

    =[ . Oh man that's just so so sad lol. I can probably only afford to go eat out 5 times and buy one item if I really want to. Good thing is I didn't include my red pocket money into the calculation =]. So I can possibly include it in and have approx. 300 to spend for the month of Feb and another 300 for march after a split up =].

    Mmm...

    Onto another topic. These past two weeks I've been attending Eagle Ridge Bible Fellowship but whereas the last sermon didn't really strike me, I think today's reminded me that I am the light and salt of Jesus whether I notice it or not. And because of this I can always make an impact on another person and minister and serve God that way.

    You see, ever since I moved over to Sweden, I felt like I wasn't doing much for God. I was no longer serving in any church so I was no longer participating in singspiration leading activities or fellowship committee planning activities, and all I could do was sometimes send a random message or two to encourage other people. But along the way I also felt the presence of God with me throughout my stay in Sweden and I felt really blessed because of it because I felt loved to the bottom of my heart.

    So today, when the pastor was talking about the three types of ministry (He talked about Jeremiah 29), I was once again encouraged to take content in what I'm doing right now even though I'm not actually serving in any particular position at the moment. I'm encouraged to continue being initiative in caring for others around me, to listen to their worries and concerns and to lend them a shoulder when they need it. Too many times it just takes that one phone call or one text message to win someone from doing something stupid or make them feel a lot better. And since I have more time on hand now, why not use it to serve others instead of just worrying about myself? Yes I know I still need to plan my times better and get things done before its too late, but I think God plans a different stage and time in life for us so that we can sometimes be busy for ourselves and what He wants for us but sometimes also busy for others.

    So the three types are:

    A ministry of presence: a ministry of being there for others when they need you. So if a friend needs you to talk and listen to them and encourage them, that is a way of serving them.

    A ministry of peace: a ministry whereby you bring peace to different types of situation. Sometimes this could be your workplace where your co-workers or managers are the people you see more often than your family members.

    and a ministry of prayer: The pastor said something really bang on this morning. When you love someone, you want to give them so much more than you can offer. And when you want that for the other person, you pray to God about it. Because we feel that only God can help us give that person whatever they desire or we desire for them. And even though we know that God may not answer our prayers in exactly what we ask for, He always listens and provides according to His loving ways.

    So there was this story that happened a week ago for a church family. A couple had planned for a home event to house 75-80 people at their backyard so that they could have a time of gathering. They expected that much people and had prepared that much food already but what they didn't expect was that there would be rain on a supposedly sunny day. So not a lot of people came and for those who came, they weren't very happy. What ended up happening was that the couple was a bit upset but decided to pack all the food up and save it for something else. But they couldn't think of what to do with all the food. And suddenly the husband thought of The Potters House, which he has never been to before, and remembered that they take donations of all kinds, so he drove all the way there and knocked on their door that rainy afternoon. Someone opened the door and asked "What can I do for you?" And the husband told him he had food to donate for 75-80 people. Then all of a sudden a group of people inside the church started dancing and cheering and praising God because amazingly, the church needed exactly that amount of portion of food for an event that night. They invited all the people but actually didn't have enough food to provide and had been praying the whole day about it. So when the husband came, they knew God had answered their prayers.

    Sometimes, God just works that way. Sometimes, in our eyes, things are bad and we become upset about it. I mean, I'm pretty sure the couple wasn't totally happy about how their home event didn't work out and people complained about it. But when we catch a glimpse of God's plans, then we can see why and understand why certain things happened the way it did. So in this event, the food was donated to those in much more desperate of need.

    And for some of us, like I heard from praise 106.5 just yesterday, we were broken because only broken people can serve breaking people. Only with understanding can we show more compassion and not just sympathy. A lesson that I'm still trying hard to learn since I'm so selfish =__="

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