March 28, 2011

These past few days I've been quite unhappy about a few things...
I haven't been able to share this with anyone but part of it has to do with family problems and part of it has to do with my own problems...
I hate how I'm surrounded by lies all the time. Everywhere. Even within my family. I don't even know what is true or not anymore and I don't even know if I can trust anybody in this world anymore for that matter. The sense of insecurity makes me wonder if I'm better off not believing in anyone anymore. I mean,"why so serious?"

I also feel like I'm at that stage where I'm transitioning from school (Happy Lala land) into the more real world where I see a lot of masks and beasts behind it all. Not that I didn't know this before. Its just hard to accept at times. I don't want to but I'm finding myself slowly forming my own masks too. Just to protect myself and shield from people who want to hurt me.

But, as with all things, on a positive note, I should take this as a lesson in life and continue working my way slowly to find my true self. I need to learn how to make my own discernment and not just accept everything as is. If I believe something is wrong or not the truth, then I will either need to speak up or accept it as a lie. Accepting it as a lie means that I choose not to believe in the statement someone makes, but that I also choose not to retaliate if its really not going to make the situation any better. There are enough problems to deal with in the first place than to stir up new ones...

:
:
:

This week I have Toastmasters on Wednesday night, Stokehouse committee meeting Thursday night, BUS 486 final Friday morning, and Exchange departure session Saturday morning! =D. So much to look forward to except for the final! No work this week I don't think...(Money money where are you???)

All from Lafarge =]
:
:
: